I finally got it done. My tattoo. And it was surprisingly easy. Did not hurt at all. Well, not much anyway. Not as much as i expected. And now i'm damn excited.

However, on that very same day... i found out that i did NOT get the position. I was so fucking disappointed, i nearly broke down. Even though i kept telling myself not to expect anything, not to hope... it still hurts... really badly. I was so lost for the whole day. And the disappointment was so apparent on my face. Coz everyone knew. And the more ppl came to talk to me about it, the worse i felt. And the worst part is having ppl tell me that I should have been the one to have gotten it instead of him. Whatmore if some of those ppl are from higher levels. And hearing that there's contention among the managers bout the decision is also not helping. The fact is this.. no matter what the contention, what other ppl think.. the decision has already made and announced. And i didn't get it. That's that. I didn't know what to do for a while there. But i talked to a good friend of mine who's a newly promoted manager and he asked me a very important question. Am i willing to wait for another opportunity? And i told him honestly that yes, i am willing to wait but i'm not gonna wait for too long. And he asked me if i could wait for 2 - 3 months. And i said i didn't know. I'd have to think bout it. And over the weekend, i did think about it. And i AM willing to wait. Coz i know that if there's another opening, i'm going to get it this time. Through my own hard work, pure will and determination. I like my job. I like the ppl in my company. And waiting another 2 - 3 months is no biggie. But if i don't get anything after that time... i'd know my destiny ain't with this company and it'd be time for me to leave then. But i KNOW i'm going to get it the next time round. Maybe i didn't do that well during the interview coz i was nervous. I knew everyone expected me to perform and everyone expected me to get it. But i've got no one to blame except myself. But i also know that i didn't screw up the interview. I went in there, and i gave it my best. Perhaps i just didn't come across as clear as i should have. And perhaps i didn't answer the questions and explain myself thoroughly enough. Nevertheless... i'll wait. And i'll get it this time.